The Kite Runner

• 1. Role of women-women didnt share much of a role. They were treated like jasbells/prostitutes. No respect. Covered up and not noticeable.
• Betrayal-the entire book was full of betrayal. 1st Baba having a affair with Sanaubar, Ali's wife and conceiving Hassan. Sanaubar leaving her family. Ali and HAssan leaving AMir.
• Brothers-brotherly bond between Hassan/Amir never knew they were brothers but had a strong friendship besides that.
• Guilt-Amir hidden the guilt about what happened to Hassan. Baba hidden the truth that the two are actually brothers due to his own infidelity.
• Redemption-Everybody had some type of redemption to redeem, but afterAmir learned of Hassan's son he had to go back for him and protect him for all Hassan had done for him.
• Exodus-the "journey" that was taken was that of Amir and baba leaving to go for freedom. Also that of Amir going back for his own nephew.
• Father and Son(Patriarchal Society)-Baba bonded more with Hassan than his own son. WHich turns out both are his. He swa more of himself in Hassan
• Class distinction-The Hazara was below the Pashtun in class. One was a servent while the other was too grand.

2.

• Parallelism-Both Hassan and Amir were like Baba(their father). amir realized after his father funeral that he also carried the same characteristics of his father and so did Hassan with the strength, coordination and all.
• Character Foils-Amir and Hassan. Cherished friendship but one didnt realize the true meaning until it was all over. Baba and Ali by living two totally different lifestyles but both did what they had too for their sons and on Baba hands Hassans.
• Foreshadowing-Amir knowing that his father dyas were limited and anting him to be there for him and Sorays marriage. Hassan having surgery and baba paying for it that brought on more tragic and on seen events to unfold leading to the truth of the brothers.
• Flashback-was set in th ebeginning in San Fransico by giving the kite to Hassan' son and thinking of the old days.
• Positives and Negatives-The portryed both aspects. The sad ones came from the betrayal starting with Baba and Ali down to Amir and Hassan. Hassan dying and Sohrab trying to commit suicide and Baba dying. the positves were the brothers learnig the truth about each other. Amir getting married and going back for Hassan's son.

3.Settings- Eid(3 day celebration) The wintrer in which the kite tornument were held.

4. Minor characters- Sanuabar-Hassan's mother left after birth of son. Soraya-Amir's wife. Sohrab-Hassan' son whom Aimr went back for. Farzana-Hassan's wife. Give birth to two kids, one stillborn. Farid-cab driver in which Amir uses for transportation.

5. Symbols/Significance-Sling shot-Hassan'suses it to protect him and Amir. Kites-bond between Amir and hassan's which the book was based on. Breasts-the bond of brotherhood that symbolizes them being brothers. Snow-innocence. Rape-the loss of innocence of Hassan.

2012

Just on Tuesday, me and my boyfriend went and seen the movie 2o12. Wow, was that a great movie. It really touched my heart and inner soul. Only you know who your higher power is and what is suppose to happene at the end of the world. Many people may have thought it was bais in some sort but to me I think it just gave it on own opinion on life after death or at least tragedy. I could not have imagined playing such an intense role. I cried at some points because just like in reality it is hard to see someone go especially before you. I am a witness to all that. Sometimes i wish there was a way that my family could just stay together an be alive and we all die at the same time. Of course, my GOd did not create us that way. It is something that we have to do one. It is just left up to the invidual to decide where the think or know they are going at judgement day. We will have an eternity to sit and think about it all. I know where I wanna go and want to be, and that is in HEAVEN with the rest of my family that has gone on before me.

ECONOMY

It is so hard to find a job in today's economy. The government and wall street seems to think it has improveed greatly since Barack Obama has been in office but there is some work to be done especially for the little people of the world. I am definetely a witness. I lost my job back in July for stupidity. At that moment I didn't know it would be this hard to find a job and if I had a known I wouldn;t be in this situation. I was tired of the job anyways, but I shoukd have listened to my mother when she to ld me not to leave until I found something better. Why must my ego be so huge? I am struggling right now to keep money. Thank God for my kids father who has been a tremendous support system for me and my kids. If you have a job stick with and do not give up until there is something better knocking at the door. I have been so discouraged latel because I am ready for my break. Please someone answer my calls and applications!!

Kids

Oh My God!! What is going in societ today. I have not gotten the just of it yet. How can a mother put her on child on the chopping block to be killed? And how can a man look at a child that is too young to even be looked at in a sexual manner, do that to a child? NO one knows. I am a proud mother of two and it saddens my heart to hear people are actually capable of doing such things. I can not imagine losing either one of my kids to the hands of someone else other than God. I am so shocked. And it seems that either of the two suspects have any kind of remorse for the child. the community seems to be more concerned than they are. The mother is also pregnant on top of it all and she has a 7 yr old son. I mean C'mon man give me a break. If having children was too much too handle then why do it or why not give the kids to someone that will love and cherish them, like the child's father. It is so sad to see the father all torn up, since he has had the littl egirl since she was born and just as soon as the mother try and justify that she is ready to take care of her, she is dead. I cannot imagine all the "WHAT IFS" thats going through his mind on the day to day basis. Its so hard. People if you have children, please take care of them and cherish them like no other cause its someone out there wishing they had one or two.

Serial Killer

Recently in the news, a BLACK man, who is also a registered sex offender, hs been charged with murders of more than 14 women and counting. It has shocked america, because normally serial killers are white male typically mid-3os. I am so shocked at all this. It is so sad to the victims families that after filing mssing persons, they finally find them but not in the way the have hoped. Most of the women range form mid-2os on up. It is so sad to know that a human being could do that to another human being and then hide the bodies on top of all that. It has been a disatrous end to this year 2oo9. I am ready to see what 2010 holds for America. Now BA's are going to have to open the profiles up and start revising profiles of serial killers to include black males also. No matter what race or gender. No one has the right to take some1 elses lives in there own habds. As I watch him on television, he seem toshow no remorse about whats going, as if he don't care, like he was waiting for them to find im and all those bodies of womn in his home. You would have thought some one would have been noticed something suspicious going on in that house or at least heard screams, but too many poeple are worried about what other are going to think of them. It would not matter to me, just as long as I know I did what I was suppose to do.

Professors

For some reason this semester I have the most awesome professor I could ever imagined. One of which I had last semster, so I already know I she roll, but fo rthe other two the are so nice and helpful. My professors have really been a part of my success and helping me to want to stay in school. If it had not been for them been so accepting and supportive, I really do not know where I would be. I am looking forward to the last few weeks of this semester and hope that everything turn out right for me. I am hoping on all A's but if not I will take A's and B's, nothing less though. If I had a chance to do it all over again, I probably would with the same professors and all. When you have good professors like that in your corner, it motivates you to strive for the best. If they can come in and tak etime out to teach you, then you can give them the respect and acknowledgement they deserve. I am so grateful fo rmy professors. I think God allowed them to be picked@random so that I could have a properous semester. Thanks to all my Professors.

Baby Here!!!

On October 26th, 2009@8:45 a.m, after been in labor for 8 1/2 hours I FINALLY gave birth to my precious little boy, Carlos Griffin Jr.. It was a long 10 mths cause thats how long I acually carried him. He was 4 days overdue. The wanted to give me a c-section because I was going through so much carrying him at the end. For the whole 1o mths of carrying him, I didn't know what he was until birth. Everybody kept telling me that all the things I am going through it must be a little boy. I was so big and heavy. I thought he weighed a ton, but at my last ultrasound on October 6th he was only 5lbs12oz and the doctors was getting worrried because he was alittle to small to be fullterm. Thank God through praying and all he cam out to be 7lbs even. He was perfect weight and height. He was 6lbs15oz on the day we left but have since grown about 13lbs. He is healthy and I am too. I am so glad for this to be over, I can almost sry, whichI did. No more kinds for me. I can not do it no more. I am thankful for my blessings, my daughter and my son, I got my pair so now its just time to stay focused in school and make the most out of it so they can live better!!

Long time

Its been so long since I have been on here. I know I have alot of making up to do. Its my fault, I haven't even thought about coming on here. Its been so much going on in my life lately. At one point I had out school on the back burner, and wanted to just give up. I prayed about the situation and I asked God to keep me focused so that i can finish out this semester and have good grades. At this point in all three of my classes I have good grades, it just coming down to the end with finals and everything. I am praying for a successful conclusion to this semester. Sometimes I have allowed stressors to play a part in my thinking instead of just going off how I feel in my heart. I am so excited to be in school and I want to go ahead and finish and the degree I am longing for. I will be the first in this generation of my family to actually go to an accredited school and graduate, no technical schools or anything. A hard, but very good College. I am trying to stay more motivated in my life and try to let to many people bring me down.

Television: Then and Now

Growing up during the 20th Century was okay, I guess. It seemed then that either I was in the house doing something constructive or outside playing with family and friends. There was hardly ever time to just sit down and watch Television, at least not at my house. Television then was not important anyways. My great-grandmother used to always say, “Television ruins your life, you do not know what is true or false.” Television has changed in many ways; size/shape, color depiction, types of shows, and leisure time. I would prefer Television of today but with some of the perks of then.
Between the 20th century and the 21st Century a TVs appearance has changed dramatically, however the size range are pretty much the same. You can get a 19in, 22in, 27in, 32in, and so on. They are still heavy in size and shape pretty much the same. However, over the years it seems they are becoming flatter and flatter. Back then you could go pick up a big, bulky TV from the store with either knobs across the bottom or knobs in the top right-hand corner. Now TVs are still big, but are flatter with their knobs practically hidden along the sides of the TV or either on the back. Some people still prefer an older model TV over a newer TV, just because it is less complicated to deal with and they probably would know all the outs and ins better.
Black and white used to be the color of everything. Some people used to have TVs that only showed black and white and some had color TVs. Color clarity of TVs are still the same. You can always go through the menu of the TV and change the settings to what best fits your eyes. It just seems now that TVs come in HD, Better LCD, depending upon the brand. All those terms relating to a TV does not really matter to the average consumer or really to the big spenders, just as long as it the picture shows up and sound comes out.
Boy, haven’t the TV shows multiplied? It is so much to watch and so little time. Some of the same shows still come on, like the news, of course, Barney and friends, “Stories”, and etc. TV lands still try and produce the same educational shows as they did then, now. Also there are still mostly the same TV stations. Now with the new satellite connection, people had to have up to date TVs to receive the same channels they are used and more, but if they were not able they were giving the opportunity to have a converter box that kept them up to date. There are still the “Stories” that come on during the daytime, but much more reality shows now. TV ratings should be mostly at its highest because of the wide range of shows been produce now. Back then TV shows went off around 1 o’clock and did not come back on until like 5 o’clock, and then at that time it was either the news or something educational for the kids before school. Now it seems as if decent TV shows begin around 6 o’clock a.m. and ends around 4 o’clock a.m. This only leaves around 2 hours of infomercials and/or sleep for some people. There are more cartoons for the kids and cooking and housing shows for adults.
Back in the day and still in some homes today, leisure time was really not a topic of discussion. Either you were outside playing or in the house doing something constructive. It did not necessarily have to be school work, but it had/has to be something other than sitting down just watching TV. If there was educational reason for watching TV then you could/can forget about looking at TV. People had/has their way around TV. I guess depending upon the household you are in, that is what really qualifies your ability to watch TV. Some kids and even adults now sit and watch TV all day depending upon what say of the week it is or what is on the agenda. That is why we have more obese people and couch potatoes. People were more active back then because there was not all this technology going around and TV was not as interesting to the average person as it now.
Television has changed so much between the 20th Century and the 21st Century. Sometimes I wish it has not changed so drastically. I still remember the good ole times and all the extra handy work that had to be done trying to keep the TV running. Now working a TV is as easy as a touch of a button. There are still many kinks in it’s’ technology that never compare to the old days but at least there is still a line where the two meet in similarities.

Health

Lately health has been a wide spread topic not only among ordinary people but in politics. I know a lot of things have raised many eyebrows in  my family. In 2005, my grandmother passed away from breast cancer(the main) and about  2 or 3 more cancers due to the breast cancer spreading. In 1998, my great-grandmother passed away also from pancreatic cancer. You see CANCER run in my family. Generation to Generation. Not only women, but also men. We try to keep a level head and stay on top of or health with regular visits and check-ups at the doctor, cause we do not want to miss anything. Just recently my mother went to the doctor for a routine check up, well since she is getting to the HILL marker, she had to take a mammogram and a glucose test due to the fact that cancer and diabetes run in our family. Well THANK GOD the glucose test came back normal, she just have to work on her everyday diet a little bit. Now the mammogram. I havent always been as close as I am today with my mother but growing older and learning new things have really allowed me to see life in a new life. So yesterday she tells me that she has to have another mammogram because the one she already taken was sort of inconclusive and they had trouble reading the xrays. I went to the doctor with her. We should find out the results next week. I am praying that everything is okay with he. I can not lose my mother not right now, it is just getting to the good part of my life and plus I dont want my brother and sister to really experience this so young. I pray everything is fine. It just goes to show you that routine doctor visits can actually save your life. 

????

Whoa!!! I haven't been blogging! That is my mistake. It just that so much been going on with me at home and with the baby. I am trying to stay focused because I do not want to flunk out this semester. So far in all 4 of my classes I am doing good, better than expected. Its the hard parts that coming up now and in the next couple of weeks. First I am due in 2 days. I have an essay due in English and an 4-7 page essay due in perspectives with a visual aide on presentation day, math I am okay just a test next week, and in MSCC 1000 I just need to take the exam. I need to stop being a procrastinator. I had everything all planned out in the beginning , but like must of us I did not fall through with them. Its better late than never, but technically I am not late just going to be pushed for time while I am trying to push a baby out or however they are going to take he/she. What is there for me to do? Can somebody help me? If I had somebody to do all my school work and even have this baby I think I would be okay!!! I just want to be successful. 

Bday

Today is starting out to be a bad day already. Its raining and there is nothing to do on my birthday, espescially with it being a monday. Tomorrow is back to school as usual and I kind of do not want this break to be over with. I turned 21 today and I feel the same. Wander why people make such a big deal out of turning 16, 18 and 21? All those days to me were the same as usual. the only thing I amlooking forward to is having this baby. I have been going through so much with this pregancy, which has caused me to be so over the edge. I am trying not to stress me or the baby out but somethings the doctors say have me kind o like uhh oh!! October is Bday month for my family. My daughter bday is on the 4th, my birthday is the 12th, my boyfriend bday is the 17th, and now I am due on the 22nd.n WOW!!!! Not enough money to go around for this month then it is 2 mths away from christmas. i am just hoping my day turns out alittle better. the rain has stopped but only for little while. I bet. Happy Birthday to me is all that matter!!!

2nd esssy

This essay was a little diffficult for me. the topics that were given via the book was okay but none really that I could just relate to and elaborate into an essay. After long thoughts, everything finally started coming together. It was a tedious task but I did it. I am not sure how well I did, but at least I did complete everything on time. I like this idea of posting your essay to the blogs and try to look for comments, but each time around it seems as if I oly get maybe one or two comments. I am not understanding why. I would love the feedback, because I know im not a writer and any suggestions or advice to help me progress forward would be excellent. Some people on the other hand I don' think takes this very serouisly or it really does not matter to them what happens or how they essay may sound. I am looking forward to the next essay and see what and how I relate to the topic at hand. maybe this time it won't be so stressful.

Day2Day

Trying to stay focused day by day has seems to become a struggle. It gets harder and harder out here just for the average human and I am surely the AVERAGE human. Sometimes I don't even feel like getting out of the bed just because I feel as if it useless. I can not control when I wake up, but I am grateful that I do live to see another day. My daughter is a bigger inspiration for getting up and going by my daily duties. i can not complain because I am truly blessed but lately trouble has seemed to follow me and I have not been happy as usual. I am 37 weeks preggo and ready for it to be over. i think that is a big reason for most of my depression. I know that I have to do this and have to that but I just do not want too. Please help me. I feel guilty for my kids sake and I just don't know what to do or who to turn too! Its amazing how my mood changes from day to day or even hour to hour. Right now I am not working and I think that is another reason that I am in the dumps most of the days. I need some sense of direction. Now or sometime before the new baby arrives.

Fast food vs. Home Cooking

Over the years health has become an outspoken topic. Not just in politics, but also in everyday, ordinary lives. Each year it seems statics changes the guidelines on what we should eat and how much of it we should eat. That is why home cooking is a better choice over fast food. Home cooking can allow you to become healthier and also bring and keep the family together. Where as fast food, tends to allow everyone to pick their own food and more than likely causes them to go their separate ways. Fast food is fattening, costly, and bad for the overall health of the family.
After a typical day at work, a normal household wife may not find it easy or exactly exciting to just say, “well I guess I will go home and cook a delicious and healthy home cook meal for the family”, but easier to say, “well I guess I will stop at McDonald’s and get the kids something to eat.” Not once to stop and think about herself or her spouse. Once at home the kids get to enjoy their hot fries or good burger, while the parents are left to fend for themselves, which we probably lead to an unhealthy choice of food. Something fast and quick just like that McDonald’s that was just picked up for the kids. Fast food is quick and easy, so there is no time basically for the family to spend with each other. Actually, after eating the family is subject to go their own separate ways, which may be outside, on the computer, or just to their room.
Eating out every day or at least 4-5 days a week can be very costly on the family’s budget. Where with home cooked food it allows you to buy the minimum or what is actually needed for the family. On average a whole meal for one person cost between $5.00 and $7.00, now if you were to buy something for everybody it would probably run anywhere from to $20.00 to $25.00, depends on where you stop. Now think about that, eating out can cost anywhere from $1200.00 to $1680.00 for an individual yearly and $4800.00 to $6000.00 for a family yearly. That is ridiculous. No one actually thinks about how much it is actually costing them to eat out on the day to day bases, but it really is affecting the family’s budget, which will lead to undue stress in the future. It is better to just budget yourself and your family food cost to a minimum of $200.00 and a maximum of $300.00 monthly by buying groceries from the store, which may actually last longer than you think and have some good health benefits in the long run.
Every time you turn around Zaxby’s, Wendy’s, Krystal’s, etc. are adding different products to their menu that seems at first glance, healthy. They put out substitutions for their fries or drinks, such as salad, yogurt, juice, or milk. Sounds good, or maybe even looks good on the menu, but actually it is not. When you think about, those are the same products that could be given at home. Even though we see those choices, we still tend to go for the usual combo without the substitutions. Just because it what we like and what we are used to. So why not save the weight and go home and cook.
Fast Food may be convenient and easy at the time, but it can save you some money and heart aches, literally in the future. Why sacrifice what little time the family does get to spend together for and a meal that was not even prepared with love. Sit down, enjoy your family, and the home cooked meal that was either prepared by you, your spouse, or even the entire family, you will be surprised by the benefits that will come out of that. More time with the family, more money for the family, and a better health for the whole family is the many benefits of home cooking versus fast food.

Campus Security

Lately in the news there has been a lot of kidnappings and murders, which has stirred up a lot of ruckus. I was definetly captured by the fact of the Yale graduate that was kidnapped and later found dead in the walls of her school. Whoa, did not see that coming. It was so sad. It touched me in a weird kind of way eventhough I did not know her. It made me think and I know everyone else, especially those that are attending college themselves. Its sad to say that you can not go out at night, let alone the day time. It makes me wonder if campus security is as tight as it should be, even for those million dollar schools. People have there opinions of everything that has been going on, but they did not think someone will actually take it that far. I am constantly thankful for going day by day not having to worry bout who or what is behind me. I know that in some way I am safe. BEING CAREFUL is the first rule I would give. Also, BE CAUTIOUS. Never let our guard down for any male or female. They might take it as being vulnerable. Always BE AWARE of your surroundings. NEVER TALK TO STRANGERS was a rule applied when I was little and it seems as if we still need to use it now. Just be careful with who you befriend, cause everybody is not friendly. 

1st Essay

Writing my first essay this semester seemed to some how give me a rush. I was more enthused about than I initially thought I would be. Right away, I knew what topic I wanted to write about and as soon as I sat down at the computer and started to type the words just started to form on the page. I tried to make frequent stops to make sure I was actually making sense instead of just typing. Little did I know I was making perfectly good sense and I it also sounded pretty good. I am guessing the reason for this is that the topic mean't so much to me that I actually had to share it. It was also part of my coping strategy. The more I actually talk about it, now write about it, it still heart but it also is a calming feeling that I get knowing that one more time I waas able to talk about it and express myself. Sometimes my paper are a little short on length, but this paper, to my surprise was three pages long.
After submitting my paper that is when the anxiety kicked in. I was not sure how people reading it on my bolg would look at it and appreciate it the same way I did or not. My biggest worries was from professor Aiken her self. Did she like it? Was she suppose to like it? How did it read to her? Where some of the questions going though my mind. I thought the worse and by the looks of my rough draft revision she put on there I was right. I still did not know whteher or not she like it or not. Maybe all the marks was not as bad as it looks. Maybe that long line drawn form one end to the next was just a mistake. Ha! Yeah right. It is okay though I am going to take what she wrote and try and make it better as much as possible. Now reading the other blogs were pretty cool. I did enjoy it. Seeing that I am not the only person that makes mistakes and really can not write as well as we may think. It is a good experience. It allows you to see what others thought of your essay and what you think of theirs and ultimately, what the PROFESSOR thinks about all the papers!!!

Struggle

Everyday has becoming a struggle for me and the little one. Its get heavier and heavier to carry. I am also starting to get morning sickness all over again. October 22nd isnt coming fast enough. I can hardly wait. Yesterday, I tried to have a last minute ultrasound before the baby got here so we could know what we were having, but it failed. The baby was being so stubborn. It would not open its legs to save the world. I laid back there almost 30 minutes until the lady finally just kind of gave up and said we couldn't try any longer. In some odd kind of way, I was kind of disappointed but happy in the same sense. I wanted to know so I could start baby shopping and then just being able to know before the big day. At the same time I said is that I would like it to be a surprise so that it can be more exciting for me and the dad. Either way i am just anxious to have this baby. During the ultasound she noticed that the baby had already turned upside down in the birthing position. There is a chance however that the baby may move again but it may not. Its just needs to come. I am ready to get all this frustration out of me plus my little bundle of joy!!!

Killings

Lately there has been a none stop of killings in America, especially right here in Macon, GA. It has began to become a pattern. Just the past week or so a store clerk gets gunned down for no particular reason. The robbers got the money but for some insane, selfish reason ONE idiot had to go back in and kill the man. sometimes I just began to wander why. Me or you will never be able to understand. Its was a brutal murder and the man did not deserve to die that way. Thanks to community efforts those 3 murders were taken off the street. God has the ultimate punishment. No state or federal judiciary can put a STAMP of PUNISHMENT on what they did. I am currently vacationing from my job at a Gas Station, the Marathon. People in my family been wanted me to quit because they fear for my life, but I continue to stay because it is my source of income. Thankfully, the store has a bullet proof cage that can only be unlocked from the inside. It is about as safe as I think it can get at a gas station. No one knows when or how a robber my strike but having that cage and an automatic lock switch for a little protection is good. Me and some other co workers speculated that we thought somebody has been planning to rob us but hasn't came up with an efficient plan that would get them in successfully. For any job of any degree I will say just be careful.

News of death
Sunday, June 12, 2005 was supposed to be an ordinary day, but as the day unfolded it was completely the opposite. I will never forget that day. About a year before that my family had gotten some bad news; my grandmother Shirley had breast cancer. Cancer runs in my family so we kind of just accepted the news and tried to help my grandmother cope with it as much as possible. I was my grandmother’s oldest grandchild and I actually had lived with her since I was eleven, so I was more upset than most because I was not use to seeing my grandmother suffer like that. She was doing the treatment as ordered by the doctor, then came the surgery. We just knew that was the end of the cancer but as time allowed it we realized it was not. What happened next had me filled with anger, sadness, and joy-in a religious way.
Life for me and my granny seemed to start looking up. She was working again and cooking that good soul food. February of 2005 brought on more heartache for us. My grandmother sister had gotten married and we had planned a reception. Everybody enjoyed the night and each other, and then tragedy struck again. My grandmother got so sick that she begun to throw up blood. Terrified we took her to the doctor. Her test came back inconclusive so they wanted her to do more follow ups with her doctor. After a series of doctor visits and tests, the phone call we were all waiting on came. It seemed as if everybody in our family were there that night to find out the news; it was not good. While my grandmother picked up one phone, we picked up the other so we could hear for ourselves what was being said. The nurse on the other end explained that the cancer had came back and not only did she have breast cancer, but it had spread to her bones and stomach. So in all she had breast, bone, and stomach cancer and it was too far gone for any treatment to cure it. Only medicine would help with the pain and it was only a matter of time before it ate her up entirely.
Neither my grandmother nor I took it very well. Who would? Knowing that the doctor had messed up and put an expiration date on your life would not leave a good feeling. I love my family though because we all came together and dealt with this as a whole. The year progressed, so did the cancer. My grandmother became, it seemed, sicker and sicker by the day. She could not eat nor use the restroom normally. Her weight dropped tremendously. By mid April, my grandmother became hospitalized again. That time they did not keep her long, they told us they estimated that she would be dead within thirty days. We took the news, but we did not accept it. As with our religious beliefs we had faith in her life and knew that God had the last word.
Then that day came; Sunday, June 12, 2005. It starts out normal. I woke and got dressed for church and for some strange reason I wanted to put on my grandmother’s perfume. I did. I also talked with before I left. At church it seemed as if everybody was asking about her, it just made me want to be home with her more. They sang songs that related to my grandmother and our situation. After church we went out eat with our church family. Then finally I got a chance to go home and be with my grandmother, since had been having an urge to be there anyways.
When we pulled up the house kind of looked deserted like no one was there and had not been there for awhile. Once inside the door, I smelt something burnt, but my focus was on my grandmother, I began to call her name while walking towards her room. Once at the door I saw her laying there facing the television, but it was not on. I continue to call her name but she was nonresponsive. My heart dropped to my stomach and I knew it, but did not want it to be so. I walk over to her still calling her name I began to shake her and try to wake her up. She was still warm. Finally my aunt came in after seeing what was burning and she called her name too. Then we turned her over and her eyes rolled back. I screamed and screamed I did not want it to be so. My cousin, who I did not know was there, came running up the hallway screaming also. I could not believe it. My mother had left and I did not know how to tell her, then the phone rang, it was her. I could not even speak, she took my emotions and she knew then and became emotional also. I lay with my grandmother until the funeral home came. Hospice came first. They wanted to know did we want to revive her because her heart beat was there but very faint. We thought for a moment but we knew how much she had struggled before now and it was her turn to go.
Things had started looking up for my grandmother, she had started to walk a little better and even eat more. As the old saying goes,” a person starts to get better before they get worse (death).” I may have lost my grandmother that day, but I gain my mother back and from that day forward our relationship has gotten stronger. Even though I wanted to blame the doctors, I knew it was God’s will. Sometimes I could not be sad from being so angry at the world for taking something from me. I never got over it, but I have learned to deal with day by day. My grandmother is in a better place and is no longer hurting or suffering and that is where my joy comes from. I will never forget June 12, 2005.

Waiting

As of today, I am 32 weeks and 5 days pregnant and it seems as if 40 weeks is so far away. I do not know what I am having so at this point, I think I am going to let it be a surprise!!! The suspense is killing me but I think I can wait it out. With everybody keep asking me, it makes me want to know more instead of holding it off in the back of my mind. I haven't thought of any names because I am a procrastinator like that. The only thing I can say is that if its a boy, it will be a junior. Easy an simple no work done with it. All the movement and stuff going on in my belly makes me very happy and sometimes makes me sick and be wanting to know what it is so I can tell it to stop. My little girl is very excited. She says its her baby. SHe loves telling the baby hey and giving the baby kisses. Sometimes I can not make her stop. We are still waiting for the baby to get here but time is not moving fast enough. I wish October 22nd will hurry up and come. Thats my due date. I know the baby may not come on that day but at least I know I can anticipate when it will be here. I am so ready. It feels like being pregnant for the first time!!!!!!

The Weather

The weather lately has been very gloomy, but in a sense I hav enjoyed it. Not in a glamorous sense, but just kind of bodily. Since I am pregnant, sleep is sort of a neccessity for me. Even if I am not sleepy, I seem to just fall in a deep sleep as if i have working twelve hour shifts. Lately when I have been waking up its either already rained and has stopped or its thundering, signifying that its about to ran. My 22 month old daugther she loves to sit in the window and say over and over,"its raining!" She become so excited by the rain, but not so the thunder. The rain has sort of been a relaxing moment for me. I usually take that time to make it a play and learn time for my daughter. She is learning so much from me and I think she is very smart for age. On the other hand, if my mother call and say come over I am hesitant because the rain over the weeked has been a little unpleasant. I was set to go over to my mother house sunday and get my hair done, not knowing it had been raining and was going to continue at an enormous rate. The water on my side of town was coming down so hard and was rising so high in the streets. I was scared, I have never liked driving in the rain since I started driving, and that was almost 5 years ago. "Its Hurricane Season" I have heard some of the reporters say and that terrifies me. I do not want another BIG castrophe to hit America again. Then at the same time its HOT and Humid like it hasn't even rained in Macon. Thats one thing about Georgia, our weather is o unique that you don't even know what to expect or when to expect it. Everybody has their own perception and likes/dislikes on weather. Pick Yours!!!!

One day@a time

Lately it seems as if everything that could go wrong has been going wrong all at one time. It sometimes has gotten me very discouraged. I look to my higher faith in my belief and trust that everything will work out in due time. While it seems as if all of the world, especially the US is struggling or going through some kind of crisis. Everybody seems to have their on belief of who to blame, but at some rate WE SHOULD BLAME OURSELVES! Everything contributes to an offset of one thing or another, no matter how we may look at it. The best thing I know to do, is to try and be focused more on the future and what is to come than holding on and staying in the past/present because the problems at the moment can cause you to dwell. Dwelling on the problems at hand can cause more problems to you or someone else. It may make you depressed and sadden your heart and cause you to think that nothing good will be able to come out of your situation, but taking it one step at a time enables you to believe there is a way out. I don't know when or how the change will come, but I trust and believe that something will happen for me, you, and the United States of America. We just have to be patient and wait for it to happen.........

Expectations

My expectations in my English 1101 class is to 1st off COMPLETE IT with a passing grade of B+ or A!!! I also would like to be able to learn and obtain everything that is taught to me, so that I will be able to carry it over into my next english class and my future. i would like to be able to put my feelings on paper and allow them to make sense. I would like to be able to adapt the format and carry my learnings from paper to paper, allowing them to become better and better. Being able to grasp hold of english and actually tryng to form a likeness to it is what I also would like to do. english has never been a favorite subject of mine but so any thing that I learn above my EXPECTATIONS would be wonderful and I will accept it and keep it!!!!